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  1. Dead Emu

From the recording Dead Emu

One morning my neighbor woke up to find a dead emu in her front yard. For real! She immediately called into her office giving her excuse for not coming to work that day as "dead emu"! I couldn't imagine a better excuse for getting out of most anything.
 

Lyrics

Woke up this morning and went outside
Could not believe my very own eyes
No daily herald, no neighbor's dogs
No birds were singing, no chirping frogs
Oh no, no, no, something much more crude
Made me spill my coffee and come unglued
Dead Emu!
 
It's the perfect excuse for ditching hard work
Or doing a good job for an ungrateful jerk
When "issues" arise it's the unexpected gift
For avoiding all that relational conflict
I can't compromise, this fight I can't lose
Give me victory or else this distraction I'll choose
Dead Emu!
 
Excuses are grand, in my head they lurk
"Gotta was my hair", "Dog ate my homework"
Calling in sick, "I've got a headache"
Let's all admit it, we know how to fake it
Can't make this one up even after a few
Today no can do 'cause ... Dead Emu!
 
When life is heavy and fears must be faced
And loving yourself is too hard to embrace
Releasing resentments is much too daunting
Thoughts of forgiveness are downright haunting
Spare yourself the trouble, no need to be truthful
The perfect excuse can be so very fruitful
Dead Emu!
 
Excuses are grand, in my head they lurk
"Gotta was my hair", "Dog ate my homework"
Calling in sick, "I've got a headache"
Let's all admit it, we know how to fake it
Can't make this one up even after a few
Today no can do 'cause ... Dead Emu!
Dead Emu! Dead Emu! Dead Emu!